church

I'm gettin ready for church right now. And am pretty excited about going. It sometimes help. I mean it always helps but lately when you leave there it definitely feels like your takin somethin with you from it. And I really need it. The message that the pastor delivers is always eye opening and definitely. Somethin that you can relate too, Right now I can slowly feel my marriage slipping through the cracks and sometimes I'm in denial about it and fight what I feel and sometimes I feel it as strong as ever and it makes me weak. And I shut out the one person that I need to get me through. It's funny how the karma in that works, the one person that can make me is the same one that can break me. God I'm lame. I've never been alone and wouldn't know how to go about it. And at the same time really don't wanna either. I just think that I'ma little to dependent of him and that's why I am like this. Either way I need to figure this mess out and sadly that's with out his help not cause I don't want it. But because he doesn't see the "situation" in the same light as I do, which makes it hard cause little does he know that he might hold the key to end this all.